Website: Amused and Abused
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Dammit all to Hell. Wasn't it just typical that as soon as he leaned over to sniff the little flowers growing beside his sniper position, Mal would appear?

"Didn't know you were into botany, Jayne." Mal managed to make the word 'botany' sound like 'lace panties' or 'furry porn', of course.

"I ain't! I was just seeing if they smelled like the one's my dear old Mother has in her garden. Don't your Mother grow flowers?" Jayne tried very hard to sound butch and manly. Wasn't working too well though. Damn flowers.

Mal scratched his head and grinned. "My Mom grew cattle. They pretty much ate any flowers. You ain't seen anything until you've seen a big steer shoot shit fifteen feet because it ate too much findleweed."

Jayne stared at Mal. "If we ever go visit your folks, remind me I need to stay on Serenity and clean my guns."

"Will do," Mal said, with a cheery grin as he turned to leave. "Remember to shoot the fat one first."

Jayne made a rude gesture at Mal's retreating back. "Like I could miss him."

"See as you don't, Daisy ." Mal's snickering could be heard long after he was out of view.

Jayne banged his head on Vera's stock, knowing he had at least six months of Daisy jokes and finding flowers in his bunk to look forward to.